9 THINGS I WISH ALL 9TH GRADE PARENTS KNEW
Advice from Upper School Counselors
The transition to high school is a significant milestone for students and parents alike. As freshmen begin navigating new academic expectations and growing independence, the next four years bring opportunities and challenges that extend well beyond academics. But what do the professionals who guide students through these years wish parents understood from the very beginning?
We asked three Mount Pisgah Christian School Upper School counselors, Jennifer Scott, Director of Counseling; Diane Nardella, Counselor; and Andrew Morrison, College Counselor, to share their perspectives. From academic planning to preparing for life after graduation, here are nine pieces of advice to help families navigate the high school years with greater confidence.
Academics: Building a Strong Foundation
1. Your GPA starts on day one.
Freshman year counts. As Diane Nardella reminds parents, the mindset of "Does this really matter?" shifts to "Everything matters." The grades students earn beginning in ninth grade become part of their cumulative high school GPA, making it important to establish strong study habits and take academic responsibilities seriously from the start.
2. Challenge your student, but don't overwhelm them.
While colleges value academic rigor, taking the most challenging courses available isn't always the best strategy for a freshman. Nardella encourages families to prioritize a strong academic foundation rather than sacrificing GPA for an overly demanding schedule.
Andrew Morrison agrees that academic rigor should increase gradually throughout high school. Selective colleges often look for students who continue challenging themselves academically, so thoughtful course planning can help students build toward more advanced coursework without taking on too much too soon.
3. Understand that each year brings different challenges.
High school isn't equally challenging in every grade, and the pressures students experience will change over time.
Jennifer Scott encourages parents to anticipate some common stress points. Freshman boys may find the transition particularly challenging as they adjust to sharing classrooms and athletic spaces with much older students. Sophomore girls may experience shifting friendships and social dynamics. Junior year often brings the greatest academic pressure as students work to strengthen their GPAs before college applications. And senior year can be an emotional roller coaster for students and parents alike.
While every student's experience is different, understanding these potential challenges can help parents recognize when their children may need additional support.
College Readiness: Preparing for What's Next
4. Start keeping track of accomplishments now.
Don't wait until senior year to start building a resume. Scott recommends creating a running document during freshman year to record activities, awards, service opportunities, and leadership experiences, no matter how small they may seem.
That seemingly insignificant recognition or volunteer experience could become an important part of a future college application, scholarship essay or first job interview. Keeping a "brag sheet" now will save students and parents from trying to remember four years of accomplishments later.
5. Encourage involvement beyond the familiar.
Some of the most valuable high school experiences happen when students are willing to try something new.
Nardella encourages parents to give their children the independence to explore opportunities outside their comfort zones, whether that's trying out for an athletic team, joining a music program or auditioning for a play.
Morrison adds that colleges increasingly consider the full picture of a student's high school experience, including both the breadth and depth of extracurricular involvement. Encouraging students to explore their interests can help them discover new strengths while developing a more well-rounded college application.
6. Focus on finding the right college fit, not just the right college name.
According to Morrison, the college search process begins with understanding who you are.
Rather than shaping their high school experience around what they think a particular college wants to see, students should focus on discovering their own interests and goals. The best college isn't necessarily the one with the most recognizable name. It's the one where a student can thrive academically and personally while remaining true to themselves.
Emotional & Whole-Person Growth: Making the Most of These Years
7. Don't underestimate the value of time together.
The next four years will go by faster than you think.
Scott reminds parents that freshman year may be one of the last years they regularly drive their children to school, practices or activities. Those seemingly ordinary car rides offer valuable opportunities to listen and connect.
Before students gain the independence that comes with driving, take advantage of those moments to encourage them, share your values and help them work through challenges. Sometimes the most important conversations happen on the way home.
8. Friendships will change, and that's okay.
The friends your child enters high school with may not be the same friends they graduate alongside. Scott encourages parents to recognize that changing friendships are a normal part of adolescence and an opportunity to help students develop important relationship skills.
Her advice? Make your home a welcoming place for your child's friends. Invite them over, feed them and give them room to be themselves.
Don't worry so much about the noise or the mess. As Scott reminds parents, there will be plenty of time for a quiet house after graduation, and you may find yourself missing the commotion.
9. Your role as a parent will evolve, but it won't end.
One of the greatest transitions of the high school years happens for parents, too.
Scott describes this shift as moving from a "coaching" role to a "consulting" role. As students grow in maturity and independence, parents have opportunities to gradually step back, allowing their children to make decisions and navigate challenges while remaining a trusted source of guidance.
The goal isn't simply to prepare students to leave home. It's to build the foundation for a healthy, lasting relationship with the adults they are becoming.
Looking Ahead
For parents of incoming freshmen, graduation can feel like a distant milestone. Yet the decisions, conversations and experiences of these early high school years help lay the groundwork for what comes next.
Perhaps the most important takeaway is that parents don't need to have every answer or anticipate every challenge. By giving students room to grow while remaining present and supportive, families can approach these four years as an opportunity to prepare their children not just for college, but for the independence and responsibilities of adulthood.